What makes good sex? The climax, tenderness or rather unusual positions? Elitepartner, an online dating agency, has taken a closer look at this question in a representative study. The results are partly surprising.
Emotions are more important to most than the orgasm
Around 6,000 women and men from Germany aged 18 to 69 were asked how they would define good sex. Contrary to popular belief that it’s primarily about the orgasm, it turned out that the emotional aspect is much more important to people.
Familiarity and closeness are the be-all and end-all of sex for 68% of women and 58% of men, whereas orgasm is the ultimate for only 40% (women) and 48% (men). At 54% (women) and 48% (men), cuddling afterwards is another aspect that emphasizes the need for emotionality and is highly popular with both sexes.
Quickie or longtimer? Men prefer a long love game
Interesting: for more than half of men, an exchange about desires and erotic fantasies is part of good sex. Something that, at just 40%, is important to significantly fewer women.
Another difference between the sexes relates to the preferred length of the lovemaking act. Do men and women like it fast or do they prefer to take their time for the pleasurable moment?
The majority of men (35%) answered this question clearly with: Sex should be long and enduring. Quickies are only an option for 22%.
In contrast, longtimers and quickies are almost equally popular among women (24% and 21%).
Younger people are more open to harder types of play
Ever since “50 Shades of Grey,” harder sexual play has been booming in German bedrooms – or at least that’s what people think. But what does the reality look like?
Not quite like this. Bondage, S&M and the like are only optional for the majority of women and men. Occasional trial and error yes, regular practice rather no. For example, just 10% of the survey participants like harder styles such as dominance or submission.
There is also a difference between the age groups. Specifically, those under 30 are more open to harder sexual play. For example, 16% of this group enjoy dominance games.
Humor is more important than romance and dirty talk
According to the Elitepartner study, people are also allowed to laugh during sex. A whole 41% say that they appreciate humorous moments during the act. This means that humor is even more important to most people than romance (28%) and dirty talk (14%).
Incidentally, the latter becomes less important with increasing age. For example, 20% of people under 30 enjoy whispering frivolous things in each other’s ears during sex, which is well above average.
In contrast, humor is extremely important, especially among older people. Among the over-50s, almost 50% would like things not always to be too serious during sex.
Men become more experimental with age
In general, certain erotic desires and ideas decrease or increase with age – and in different ways for women and men.
For men, for example, the desire to experiment increases from the age of 40, as does the desire to discuss sexual needs with their partner. For women over 50, on the other hand, these needs tend to decrease.
But there are also overlaps between women and men. For example, regardless of gender, familiarity and closeness are in the foreground during sex from the age of 50 (50-59 years: 70%, 60-69 years: 71%). In addition, in the older age groups, 60% like to exchange caresses and cuddle during lovemaking.
